Monday, January 24, 2005

Is required?

The publication of this article in Sunday's Denver Post lit up the biggest Colorado Pagan e-mail list.

Of course, we recognized a pentagram ring--and the reference to reading Robert Heinlein's Stranger in a Strange Land rings a big Pagan-history bell, about the founding of the Church of All Worlds in the 1960s.

But now people are asking, "Is monogamy subtly put down in the Pagan community? Is there pressure to be polyamorous?"

One poster, a divorced mother with a steady boyfriend, notes, "When I was married, I found it hard to find support for monogamous relationships in the community. The implication seemed to be that if you were monogamous, you were really just repressed and needed to get with the program."

The high priestess of a Boulder coven, married 25 years, talks of people assuming that she must be polyamorous. "When potential initiate/students come to me on a first information-gathering chat, they often ask if it is required to sleep with the [high priestess] or [high priest]." The answer for her is no, absolutely not.

It's an aspect of Pagan life that isn't discussed too often outside the arena of plain old gossiping. When your religion--many forms of Wicca, at least--is heavily erotic in its symbolism, does that symbolism cross over into personal behavior? Like Carrie Bradshaw, I will leave the question hanging.


Blogger ChaliceChiq said...

I have to admit I too have felt a lot of pressure to be poly. And I don't want to be poly. There is also a lot of pressure and a lot of assumption that I am bisexual. I explored that aspect of my sexuality LONG before I even HEARD of Wicca, and have concluded I'm *mostly* straight, but not exclusively so.

There are TONS of assumptions made of Pagans, that I've seen over the years:

1: That all Pagans are in favor of and use recreational drugs (no matte their legal status in whatever country the Pagan lives in)

2: That all Pagans are polyamorous and bisexual

3: That all Pagans read and want to live in fantasy fiction novels like "The Mists of Avalon" or some such

4: That all Pagans are into roleplaying games like AD&D

5: That all Pagans use archaic speech such as "thee" and "thou" and prefer to wear medieval-styled clothing, given a choice

Things like that. I should post a whole entry on some of the assumptions Pagans make about each other and that really do get circulated around the Pagan world.

11:41 AM  
Blogger Kate said...

On the other hand, I'm poly and it seems like lots of people assume I'm Pagan.

10:08 AM  

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